thisisreal;thisisme.
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yourstruly,
My name is SAMSON.AXELANDER KO
24THDECEMBER1992 
thflashbacks,
October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 August 2010 November 2010 January 2011 February 2011
lovedbyme,
Samson Axelander Ahxiang -jeffrey.BABY♥♥♥ -fabian.barthez ♥♥♥ -siokyit.tan ♥♥♥ -blythe.kimberly ♥♥♥ -nicole.tan ♥♥♥ -XINYI.penguin ♥ -angeline.poh ♥
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Sunday, July 19, 2009
i don't deserve your care and concern.REALLY. i don't know why you're so good to me but i'm happy at least someone genuinely cares. i don't know what to tell you because i really have nothing to say. maybe i do, but i don't know how to put it. and it's nothing about all of you guys. it's me. all me. i'm crazy, i'm stupid, i'm selfish, i'm dumb. just leave me alone will you? maybe i'll really regret it.but i rather you guys not care. all your worries for me just makes me feel more and more like a FUCKING burden. when i'm with you people, all i want to do is to have fun have fun and have more fun. but i've been a fucking spoiler.and i have no choice. it's not like i can control myself. maybe nothing was wrong with me. but after all the visits to my teachers, my counsellor andthat psychiatrist, i'm beginning to think that i'm a lunatic. i just feel fucking down all the time. not just sometimes when my face occasionally changes. i just try and try so hard to put that smile on. but deep down,i'm bleeding. crying. killing myself. like fuck.i don't know how to face you guys. seriously.so i think i'll just live my life alone. i know that you people care.but just leave it will you? i'm feeling so depressed all the time, i'm no longer afraid of dying. i went to the 13th level just now and looked down.i no longer had that chilly feeling running down my spine.i think i'm just too accomodated to looking from high buildings thinking if i should just end my life.i wanted to. that very instance when i was running. thoughts raced through my mind as i ran from you. i just felt so effing useless.what was i running from? you? no! i was running away from my problems!but what are they? i don't know.how can i tell you about them when i don't even know myself? when i said 'i don't know.', i meant it. i'm really clueless about myself.you asked me how i felt. it was all nothing.i felt absolutely nothing. like a numb emptiness that lurks there forever and just won't budge. i was super angry with myself so i ran.SORRY bro. it had nothing to do with you. you shouldn't feel bad either. if i really take my own life someday, just remember me as the cheerful little bro that you had. :D:D:D hahas. LYG. <3 but now,i'll just have to try and live this life full of misery and anguish. if life was fuckable, i'll fuck it every single day.
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