thisisreal;thisisme.
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yourstruly,
My name is SAMSON.AXELANDER KO
24THDECEMBER1992 
thflashbacks,
October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 August 2010 November 2010 January 2011 February 2011
lovedbyme,
Samson Axelander Ahxiang -jeffrey.BABY♥♥♥ -fabian.barthez ♥♥♥ -siokyit.tan ♥♥♥ -blythe.kimberly ♥♥♥ -nicole.tan ♥♥♥ -XINYI.penguin ♥ -angeline.poh ♥
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Tuesday, December 18, 2007
with only a few days to my long awaited 15th birthday, i'm feeling very miserable.this is the worst year i've had and i just can't imagine what life is going to be like next year. hais,da gu asked me how i wanted to celebrate my birthday. i couldn't give her an answer so i said i did not want to celebrate. i spent last year's birthday at church and i regret it.but i did love the bbq at shuling's place we had as 1 big family.almost everyone in the cell was there.it was a christmas cum my birthday celebration. had loads and loads of fun.i spent more than 100 bucks for the presents and i do not regret.i think it was worth the while.each year,i wait in anticipation for my birthday to arrive.but year after year,it is getting more and more meaningless to hold any momories.i really missed the past.the young and innocent SAMSON GAO YUXIANG.but as many have told me. you cannot turn back the time even if you can turn back the clock. this is really very true.how can i not even have an idea of how i am going to celebrate my birthday?a failure.that's who i am.strange isn't it. i really cannot put my feelings to words of mouth.i feel very uneasy. but if you ask me to write,i surprisingly can.with almost full details of how i'm feeling and what i'm thinking.i really think that blogging is the thing for me.i do not have to care about a thing in the outside world because it is between my computer and i. i really do want to celebrate my birthday.i just do not know what to do.i do not want to have a situation where people i invite or whatsoever cannot come due to various reasons that the person gives.i know this is being unfair.so i rather not have the celebration. thank you da gu for the thought of wanting to help me organise a party of some sort but i really do not have the mood to do or have any celebrations now.i feel so hard up.so miserable,so pathetic.so weak.i do not have the heart for anything now.not even for GOD.that is one thing that i must admit.i've let GOD down.doing things i shouldn't and not even thinking about him.who am i exactly.i'm confused.with mixed feelings and emotions. why must things come to a situation like this?i do not feel like doing anything now.blogging is the only thing i have left my energy for. i have tons of holiday homework not done yet although i have finished most of my assignments.i really do not have the heart to study now. things that have happened in my family turned me into who or may i say, what i am today.but again.i must stress this.i am not blaming anyone. if any of my family member accidentally come across my blog and see what i wrote here,i ask that you do not get the wrong message out of my posts.some may be written out of anger,frustration or just rash moments. do not take it to heart.i do love all of you.i do.6 days to my birthday.SIGH
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